No more “boys and girls” in BC public schools

The British Columbia Teachers’ Federation wants to see gender neutral classrooms where children are free from “rigid beliefs about gender identity and expression” so that they are able fully express themselves without stereotypical language like “boys and girls” negatively influencing them.  After all, kids will soon learn, gender is “a product of the mind”, it’s not something we’re born with.  Gender can change as our feelings change and the development of our gender identity happens from birth until death.  In fact, BC teachers will espouse, gender is really a spectrum and we can feel free to explore this spectrum from male to female and everything “in between and outside of” those outdated designations.  ”There are many gender identities” and “being transgender or gender non-conforming is normal and healthy”.

Teachers are being asked to “embed” this teaching throughout the curriculum.  Kindergarten students will be read fairy tales like “The King and the King” about two princes who fall in love and get married.  Grade two students will be taught how to yell, “Stop! Sexism!” every time they hear a “gender stereotype” in a typical fairy tale.  The Dress Up Centre will “encourage students to be whomever they want to, irrespective of gender”, it will stress the importance of “trying new activities”.

I’m amazed that this worldview is being implemented in BC schools without more public discussion.  I’m not sure that the majority of British Columbians would agree that gender is a spectrum.  Likely, most people celebrated the birth of a new child with, “It’s a boy!” or “It’s a girl!”  And while gender certainly influences some of our behavior, I think most British Columbians also recognize that there is an equality between the genders without there being a sameness.  Girls play hockey – and well!  Boys can play the flute – I saw a very masculine teen boy playing the flute at the Penticton Music Festival this year.  Neither of those activities deserves to be given a “gender rating” by BC students.  And yet, that’s just what one of the lesson plans the BCTF wants to see implemented in BC classrooms suggests.  I thought we were past stereotyping interests.  No, the BCTF suggests that teachers hand out cards with things like, “This person has long hair.” or “This person loves hockey.” or “This person wants to be an engineer.” and then have students give them a “gender rating” of 1 to 5.  The goal is to talk about gender stereotyping, but I think this kind of an exercise is very ineffective at erasing stereotypes. Teaching students to rate activities according to gender even while explaining that those ratings are wrong and stereotypical while also teaching students that “gender is a spectrum” will naturally cause students to view their activities according to where on the spectrum they sit. This could result in students who have “gender non-conforming” interests to see themselves as less than male or less than female, rather than seeing themselves as fully female and loving hockey or fully male and loving the flute.

Why teach about gender at all?  The BCTF says, on the one hand, that they’re teaching about the gender spectrum in order to combat bullying.  Yet, on the other hand, they say it’s their role to combat gender stereotyping and “rigid beliefs about gender identity” in order to give students the “ability to fully express themselves”.  I believe it’s absolutely vital to create safe and inclusive schools for all students and families.  Every student should feel valued and safe at school.  However, I don’t think it’s the school’s role to teach my children a theory of gender that is not scientifically backed up or widely accepted by society.  My boys are boys – whether they’re kicking someone’s ass in Taekwon-do or playing classical music in a chamber trio they are all boy.  I don’t want someone confusing them with weird ideas about music being “gender non-conforming”.  What?  Nor do I want someone telling my second-degree Black belt girl that she isn’t fully girl regardless of how “gender non-conforming” her activity of choice is.  Puberty is confusing enough – I can’t imagine the angst that BC kids are going to go through when they’re told that there is a whole “spectrum” of genders for them to explore – from male to female to two-spirit to transgender and beyond!  One day they may feel like using the girls’ locker room, the next day they may be more comfortable in the boys’; never mind, it’s all good – they can use whichever one they wish.

The BCTF wants students to know that gender is a state of mind.  They write in their guide that “hormone blockers are a safe way to ‘buy time’ as the transgender teen decides whether to go on cross-hormones…This treatment is widely endorsed by family doctors, endocrinologists, psychologists, and other specialists involved in transgender health programs.”  Really?  How “widely endorsed” are these drugs, anyway?

They say that we shouldn’t worry that this teaching about the “gender spectrum” will increase the likelihood that our children will experience gender confusion and yet they also say that “the process of becoming a man or a woman is heavily shaped by our culture and society”.  So, if our culture and society are teaching that there is no such thing as a “boy” or a “girl” but that everyone is somewhere on a gender spectrum and that gender is based entirely on our state of mind (which can change at any given moment) then what do teachers think the result of that cultural and societal influence will be on the next generation?  In their own document they say that gender is not simply determined by nature, but that it’s equally influenced by “nurture and context”.  So, if the nurture and context of gender identity is now being shaped by ideas of a “gender spectrum” where “being transgender or gender non-conforming is normal and healthy” then we will have a greater number of children who struggle with gender identity issues.

We can teach love and respect and friendship without delving into unfounded theories of gender development and identity.  We can teach our kids that we’re all different, and that’s Ok, without telling them that “gender is a product of the mind”.  We can have schools where students work together, participate in activities they love to do, and are positive, contributing members of the community without promoting confusion about gender identity.

Parents of students in BC public schools need to fully understand what their children will be taught – from K to grade 12.  And parents who are considering public school as an option for their children should really do their research before making that choice.  Students are learning far more than how to read and write in school.
The BCTF has a social agenda and it’s pushing hard.  This resource was launched on the Day of Pink in order to assist teachers in combatting bullying for real or perceived sexual orientation.  Teachers are told that this resource will help “address homophobia and transphobia in schools”.  There is a world of difference between addressing these issues and actively teaching that gender is a state of mind that will change throughout one’s life.  This resource is not meant to just help teachers create safe and welcoming schools for all children, it’s meant to change what it refers to as “outdated and oppressive views of gender [that] continue to circulate in our everyday understandings of what it means to be human.”

http://bctf.ca/uploadedfiles/Public/SocialJustice/Issues/LGBTQ/Resources/GenderSpectrum.pdf – BCTF document on teaching about the “gender spectrum” in the classroom

http://www.bctf.ca/publications/NewsmagArticle.aspx?id=22917&printPage=true – BCTF article on the launching of their new Gender Spectrum resource.

New Beginnings

I love the start of a new school year.  It’s fresh and clean and no one has written “I hate math” in their math book – not that any of my kids have ever done that.  I’m usually so eager to start the new school year that we begin in earnest a week earlier than campus schools start.  Not this year.  This year there has been enough busy-ness and enough changes to warrant an extra week off.  I need the time to regroup and to plan and to sort.

We have big changes this year.  Abbie is off to high school.  Public high school.  And I’m ok with that.  I’m actually glad.  I wish that we had a group of homeschooled kids who wanted to get together to take the kinds of classes she’s taking at school, but we don’t.  And so off she goes.  I’m relieved to not have to think about upper level sciences and math.  Or French.  And she’ll be great there. 

She’s also gone on an independence kick and let us know that she really wanted the downstairs homeschool room as her bedroom.  Yes, you heard that right – she asked for my homeschool room.  And I sacrificed for the greater good.  The room is now empty and painted purple.  She moves her furniture in on Thursday.  The contents of my homeschool room have been redistributed.  We’ll have a “library” in the rec room downstairs while most of our day to day supplies will be in cupboards on the main floor.  This is going to take some getting used to.

On a completely positive note, we’re doing Tapestry of Grace at co-op.  This has been an answer to prayer for me.  I have loved doing Tapestry of Grace at home, but having a group of kids for history and lit discussions is going to be amazing.  I’m also excited about the opportunity to have a hands-on projects class.  And the kids at co-op are fabulous – we’ve got an incredible group of people pooling their talents to create memorable learning opportunities for the kids.  I can’t wait for co-op to start.

This is going to be a great year.

What I’m doing today…

Finding Rest

I was asked last week whether I ever need a break from my kids.  There are usually a couple of times a year, now that they’re all older, that I have to myself.  David’s parents take the kids for a week in the summer and David ends up taking them for a couple of days at some point during the year.  To tell you the truth, I enjoy those times.  I really like the feeling of being alone and I sit joyfully in the silence when everyone is gone.

But, I also find rest when they’re here.  A break once or twice a year is more than enough for me.  I don’t need a regular girls’ night out or a vacation without my kids.  It’s not because I’m a saint or some kind of super mom or anything, either.  I think there are two reasons for this.

The first is that their best hours, when they’re most awake and alert and fun to be around, are the hours that we spend at home together.  It’s not fair, really.  Most parents have a couple of hours in the morning while everyone is getting up and getting ready for school and then they get a few hours at the end of the day – when the kids are tired and need to be driven to soccer practice and fed dinner and bathed and then put to bed so they can get up early and be out of the house on time for another day.

Instead, I’m home with mine.  The second reason hit me one day last week while I stirred the rhubarb I was stewing.  Aidan, Charlie, and Jacob were sitting up at the table nearby and I moved between the rhubarb and the children; giving a stir here, helping with a math question there, talking about when we should go for a swim, getting my coffee ready for the history discussion that Abbie and I had planned.  I breathed in the peace of knowing that I was right where I was meant to be – home – living and learning with my children.  Sure, there are days when they drive me crazy, but for the most part our days are good.

God called me to disciple my children.  He called me to teach them about Him when we rise and when we sit and when we walk along the way.  If my children spent the majority of their waking hours – their best hours – in school, the opportunity I have for discipleship would be greatly diminished.  I’m thankful for the time I have with them – the unhurried, restful time that we have together because it’s the time that gives me the opportunity to speak God’s truth into their lives. 

And I think that God knows how weak I am.  He knows that if I only had early mornings and the time between school letting out and bedtime (with the parade of tasks that need to be done after the kids get home from school) that I wouldn’t have the patience to invest in discipleship.  I’d be more concerned with getting everyone where they need to go on time, with making sure everyone remembered to bring their music books or their sparring gear, with packing snacks and lunches and permissions lips.  I know this because it’s what happens when we’re not at home together.  It’s what happens on Sunday mornings when we try to get out the door for church on time.  It’s what happens at the end of our day at home together when we have to get ready to leave for Taekwon-do and piano and whatever else we need to do.  I’m not a patient parent during those times, I’m not a particularly good parent during those times and I’m usually not marvelling at how amazing it is to watch God at work in the lives of my children (although sometimes I’m praying for just a little more patience to get me through the rest of the day). 

I am blessed.  Each and every day that I spend with my children is a gift from God.  Knowing that I’m carrying out God’s purpose for my life, as I invest in the lives of my children, sustains me and gives me the kind of rest that time away from my family can never offer.

My last kindergarten student…

*Sniff* I’ve come to my very last year of kindergarten.  My baby turns five in October which means this is it.  In the fall we’ll begin kindergarten and it will be the last time I get to experience the magic of teaching a child to read and watching a whole new world open up. 

Kindergarten is a special year.  This is the beginning.  This is where first steps are taken and I’m so blessed to be able to take Charlie’s hand and walk step by step with him through this very special year.  I want to watch the look of concentration on his face when he tries to sound out a new word, I want to cheer with him the first time he counts to 100 and I want to cuddle with him while we read stories together. 

I’m taking a break from work for this year – partly so I can concentrate on bringing my last child officially into our homeschool day; so I can make his kindergarten year memorable and so that I have time to stop and smell the roses with him. 

Academically, things are pretty simple.  I’ll teach him how to read.  I’ll start working through Right Start math with him at a pace he’s comfortable with.  I’ll work on printing skills using an age appropriate program that I hope will work – he’s a lefty.  And I’ll read to him. 

We’ll likely dip in and out of Five in a Row.  I wouldn’t want him to miss out on exploring the Yangtzee river with Ping, or on smelling the flowers with Ferdinand, or on finding creative solutions to outdated technology with Mike and his steam shovel.  We’ll also join in with the older boys as we all study Ancient Times – beginning with Creation we’ll learn about history up to the year 500 AD.  There will be Jewish feasts, cookie dough maps of Egypt, and temple building to take part in with the older boys.  And more reading.

And that’s just what’s happening at home.  We’ll also continue with violin (private lessons and group with his friends), play dates and possibly some co-op opportunities.  He’s also got Taekwon-do and Italian lessons. 

This is my last year of kindergarten and I’m looking forward to all of the adventures that Charlie and I will have together this year.  I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

My Eldest is in Ottawa

We discovered the Encounters with Canada program.  Abbie chose this week:

International Affairs

Be a global citizen! This week’s participants attend an International Challenges Conference at Canada’s Department of Foreign Affairs and International Trade, exploring the fascinating and complex global issues of our time. Prominent and accomplished international affairs experts share their insights on international youth programs, life in the foreign service, Canada-USA relations, the United Nations, global conflicts, international crime, international development, and more. Interactive workshops, simulations and tours round out the week.

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It fits in really well with her interest in Sudan.  I’m excited about the opportunity she has this week, although the mom in me is wishing she would call more often!  I talked to her for about five minutes last night – long enough for her to tell me that they’d be going to the Parliament buildings today. 

The best part about this program is that it’s available to kids all across Canada regardless of their income or location.  They pay all of the travel costs – the only cost that isn’t covered is the $625 for room and board at the Terry Fox Youth Centre.  I know Abbie would have been more than willing to allocate her Christmas and birthday money to that in addition to working as hard as she could to raise the rest…but she didn’t have to.  We were able to use our funding through Heritage Christian Online School to pay for that cost so her entire trip to Ottawa was free. 

I can’t wait to hear more about her week!

A New Reading List

We’re a few months into 2010 now and I still haven’t carefully crafted my reading lists for the year.  It doesn’t seem to matter that I never fully accomplish my reading goals for the year – I keep setting them and, for some reason, the goals keep getting loftier.

This list is a multi-year goal and the exciting part is that it’s a list that Abbie and I will read together.  Well, not together, exactly, but eventually we’ll both read through this list and have the opportunity to discuss the books with each other. 

How fast our kids grow…  She starts grade 10 this fall (more on that later) and although I hope to convince her to take four years to cover high school I’m pretty certain she’ll be done in three.  And then that’s it.  Homeschooling is finished and she’ll take full control of her own education.  And I’ll be left with a shelf full of things I had hoped to make time for.

So, before I cry over my unfulfilled shelf, I thought I’d start making lists.  The first is a list of non-fiction books (or topics if I haven’t found a good book yet).  These are topics that I want to explore and that I feel are important to discuss before Abbie graduates. 

There’s a great thread over at the high school board on TWTM that discusses high school must reads.  That’s where the initial topic list came from and I’ve adapted it to our needs.

Media Awareness – I want her to be aware of how media and advertising can influence our choices and beliefs.  I have an mp3 of a talk on this from a Christian perspective, but I’d also like a book with a focus on advertising.

Education – The Global Achievement Gap by Tony Wagner, Weapons of Mass Instruction by John Taylor Gatto

Food – Mindless Eating by Brian Wansink, In Defense of Food by Michael Pollan

Resources – Canadian Water Politics: Conflicts and Institutions, as well as Carbon Shift: How Peak Oil and the Climate Change will Change Canada (And Our Lives), I’m still looking for one with a more global outlook.

Environment -

Poverty – Nickel and Dimed by Barbara Ehrenreich, I’d like to add a book on poverty in Canada.  Abbie’s already reading two books on life in Sudan which do a good job covering poverty in a third world country.

War – War Is… by Marc Aronson, looking for another couple of titles here.

Middle East – Unsettled: The Problem with Loving Israel by Marc Aronson

Taking Action – Do Hard Things: A Teenage Rebellion Against Low Expectations by Alex Harris and Brett Harris – Abbie’s already read this and it has inspired her and her friends to devote a lot of time and energy to raising money for orphans in Sudan.  But…I haven’t read it yet.  Now it’s on the list.

Globalization -

Economics – The Ascent of Money by Niall Ferguson

Technology – I’d like to find a good book on bioethics.  For starters, we’ve got Discipling this Generation for a Digital World by Greg Bitgood which talks about how fast technology is moving and encourages Christians to be aware of what’s happening and really think through the ramifications of it and our own role in shaping the future.

Leadership – Maybe just a good biography in here? 

That’s it for now.  I guess I’d better get reading; time is running out.